Listen Skinny Bitch....

I think the thing that put me over the edge was a conversation with my trainer yesterday.  So here I am working my 300 lb ass off on the treadmill yesterday and my trainer who weighs probably a buck twenty five (125 lbs) soaking wet starts talking about taking my measurements.  I tell her that's fine, but honestly I don't really care about numbers as much as I care about how I feel.  True to form, she doesn't listen to anything I say and responds in her perky little girl voice "I don't know if you have somewhere to go this summer...maybe a wedding..." and I think to myself are you kidding me?  So I tell her in a not-so-friendly and matter-of-fact voice "that's what skinny women say."  "Skinny people are worried about losing 10 lbs so they can look better than their friends at the next big event."  "Fat people don't care about losing 10lbs for a wedding...we care about feeling better."  "I'm going to tell you this once.  I DON'T CARE ABOUT NUMBERS, I CARE ABOUT HEALTHY."  As I kept walk/jogging on the treadmill I was thinking to myself, yeah, that's right I weigh 300 lbs but dang, if I only weighed 290 lbs I would be the hottest chick E.V.E.R......Sheesh......it's no wonder us heavy people often feel alone.  It isn't as easy as just losing 10 lbs....don't get me wrong, every 10 lbs makes a difference but have some sensitivity people.....think about what you say. 

The honest truth is, as I go on this journey I will be watching the scale and sharing what it says on this blog but it will not define my weight-loss success.  I will know I am successful when I can get on a roller coaster with my kids and not have to worry about the safety restraint fitting.  I will know I am successful when I feel like a vixen in the bedroom.  I will know I am successful when I can STOP taking my high blood pressure and diabetes meds.  THAT is what will define my success......